Wasting time...

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You know, I was doing pretty good. I thought that she was being open with me. But I guess I was wrong. I found something today that she hid the other day. Why hid things. That is NOT honest behavior. Why didn't she just throw it out? Why did she have to save it? It makes me think that I'm wasting my time.

Holiday and such...

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Want to hear my take on the Holiday and welfare today? Follow this link to my other blog. What are you waiting for? Click, already!

Winter is coming...

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Well, Thanksgiving has come and gone, and so starts the official Christmas shopping season. Where does the time go? Every year seems shorter. This time of year I usually find myself reflecting on all the things I wanted to do but didn't. There are a lot of things I wanted to fix around the house. I still haven't built the new sub boxes for the car yet. Hell, I didn't even get the snow blower running yet. We've already had a good snowfall (4") that I could have used it if it was running.

Winter used to be my favorite time of year. I love the snow and all that it brings. But last winter was my lowest time even though I didn't know it at the time. So this winter seems to be coming with a lot of mixed emotions. Some of the dates I used to look forward to now seem stained. I have been doing my best to put on a happy face, and I think I have been good at it. I'll have to find a way to get through the added stress that this normally happy season brings.

New site...

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I have been looking around for a new place to jot down my daily ramblings, and I think I've found a place that I like. It's called Blog City. There are lots of features that I like and it comes with a lot of the mods that I made to this one.

I've placed a link to the new site in the link list. Feel free to check it out. The plan is for me to use the new site for my daily observations and rambling. I will still be posting here for the more personal stuff. So feel free to go to both sites, if you like. And comments are always welcome.

With any luck, as my marital situation improves with time, there will be a gradual decrease in posts to this site, and an increase at the other one. That way I will be able to continue my blogging exploits years into the future without still carrying around the broken hubby name when it no longer applies.

The new site is still in its infantcy, so if you see something (like a terrible color scheme) please let me know. I have a terrible eye for color.

Back to basics...

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I have come to the realization, today, that I have lost touch with the reason I started this blog. Originally, this was a place for me to vent my feelings. A way to get my thoughts out of my head and down on paper. Looking back at the last few weeks of posts, I see that I have not been true to myself. Due to this, I think, I have been suffering from a build up of unexpressed emotions. I was more concerned with "appearing" happy than actually writing my true feelings. For the sake of my mental health, I need to get back to basics, so to speak.

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Lately I have been overcome with the feeling that nothing is real. Often times, she would whistle and call me sexy as I walk by, but it felt like she was reading a script. This has been puzzling me for some time. I think the reason is because there is no passion in her eyes anymore, and I don't know how to get it back. Every time I try to "turn her on" all I do is find another way to turn her off.

Friday night we went on a date. Just the two of us. We sent the kids over to Gina's house and went out for a nice dinner. I thought the date went well, but when we got home, she just rolled over and went to sleep.

I'm not trying to say that she is at fault, or did anything wrong, because the fact of the matter is that if she would rather sleep it's my fault. I'm the one who failed. I should have been more romantic. I should have been funnier. I should have been more fun to be with. If the passion is gone, I'm the one to blame.

Not feeling right...

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I really want this to be a daily record of my thoughts. But I have been feeling a little less than ordinary, lately. It makes it tough to develop rational thoughts. My head seem to be stuck on over drive and it won't slow down long enough for me to write anything down. I can't even put my finger on what has been causing it. Perhaps, I'll be able to put it into words tomorrow. Good bye for now.

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Pets...

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Today, I thought I would share my pets with you. I'm not including what I consider second class pets. The ones you don't interact with. Only the 'real' pets. We have two fish and a bird. While they are nice to watch, there is no bond like you get with a cat or a dog.

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Lucky Luke

Luke is our newest arrival. He had a very solitary childhood. We rescued him from a medical research lab. The first three years of his life was spend in a 4' x 2' stainless steel cage. He was only let out once a day while they cleaned his cage. The workers in the lab were instructed not to interact with the animals and they had very minimal contact. The only human contact was his monthly Vet visit, which was just down the hall.

When we first went to see Luke, he was extremely timid, and very nervous. His hair was falling out, he was so scared. He had never had that much attention and could not cope with it. During our first visit, I noticed that he has a tattoo in each ear. In his right ear is his AKC registration number(full blooded beagle). In his left ear is an FDA registration, which identifies him as a "lab animal". I fell in love with him at first sight. I love beagles. It took about a month for the lab to check me out and OK us for the adoption. But, we got him!

Keep in mind that Luke has never been out side of the beagle section of the lab, let alone outside of the building. As luck would have it, it was snowing when I was driving home with him. His first glimpse of the outside world was in the snow. He didn't know what to do. The only thing he knew was that it was COLD. His coat was thin due to him being in climate controlled conditions. The first 2 weeks at home, his nose didn't stop once. It took over three months for him to even bark, and when he did it was very soft and raspy. Imagine that, a beagle that doesn't bark.

Fast forward to today. Luke is VERY affectionate now. Where ever I go in the house he is right at my heels. We have had trouble with him running off when he slips out the door or his rope breaks. He spent one night in doggy jail. But, after all, he is a scent hound. Once he catches a scent that he likes. He will follow it to the end no matter where it leads. He is still rather skidish, but nothing like when he first arrived.

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Kisha Lynn

We got Kisha when she was about 9-10 months old. Still acting like a puppy, but in a full sized body. Not that she is very big. About the same size as Luke, actually. They are both about 25Lbs.Kisha is what I describe as the "perfect" dog. Very affectionate, and loyal. Always ready to play. But she never strays. When it is time to go outside. I just open the door and let her go. After about 5 minutes, if she is out there alone, she is barking at the door to come back in. She hates to be alone. She would love to be outside with me when I was working on my Jeep. She would slip under it with me and watch what I was doing. All to often she would also be licking my face, but she is always right there.

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Skooter

This is a bad pic, but you get the idea.

Now...Skoot is the real head of the house as far as the pets are concerned. He is firmly planted at the tippy top of the pecking order. Sure, he likes to play "catch me" with Kisha IF he is in the mood. But will not even acknowledge her if he is not.

Skooter was actually Deb and my first responsibility as a "couple". We got him 12 years ago when he was far to young to be separated from his mother. We fed him from a bottle for the first few weeks. As a result, he still sees us as mothers to him. He is loving to the point that it gets annoying. When I lie down to go to sleep, he will lay on my chest and stare me in the face until I pet him. If I don't, he will give me a little head butt on the chin, just to make sure that I know he is there. And he won't take no for an answer. You can tell when he wants you to pet him because he'll be purring before he even gets there. You can hear it from across the room

About ten years ago, we came home to find Skoot laying on the bed and would not move. We rushed him to the animal emergency room and they had to keep him over night on an I.V. drip due to dehydration. $400 later I picked him up in the morning and took him to the regular Vet. $150 later, they didn't know what was wrong, but they gave us some antibiotics to give him. He perked up after a couple days, and has been fine ever since. The only permanent effect from the ordeal is that he can't meow. He will open his mouth and go through the motions, but no sound comes out.

Nothing on my mind...

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I'm posting today with absolutely no ideas. So, I'm just going to write whatever comes into my mind and walk away until I get something else, and write it down. Let's see where my twisted mind will take us today.

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Work and stuff

At work we are having this program called "Continuous Polishing 5S Lean Manufacturing Initiative". I think that title slipped past the management. I don't think they are aware that 5S stands for "Shower, Shave, Shit, Shine, and Shampoo".

When I arrived at work tonight there were pink post it notes all over the place. There must be 100 of them. Stuck on tooling and fixtures, with things like "not used in 6 months" and "should be stored elsewhere" written on them. I guess the idea is for us to look at the tools and determine a good storage location or throw it out. Trouble is, some of these things were rather expensive to have made. Some were in the neighborhood of $10,000. There is no way we can store it all out of sight, so some of it is going to get tossed. Seems like a rather high price to pay to eliminate clutter.

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Winter

It is official. Mark my words. This is definitely going to be a mild winter. We will not likely see more that two inches of snow at a time. Why? Because I have a snow blower, that's why. It always works out like that for me.

A few years back I was building a telescope. I got to the point where the secondary mirror was finished. The scope was basically just waiting for the primary mirror that I was finishing. Now, I didn't want to coat the mirror until I knew that I had the eyepiece position correct. The only way for me to be sure, was to install the primary and test it out. So, I coated the mirror with what is called "silver spray". Which looks just like an aluminum coating, but only lasts for a few months before it starts to dull out, and it is VERY easy to scratch off. Then I took the mirror home and put it all together. Well, Guess what? It was cloudy for like 4 straight WEEKS. By the time I could test it the silver spray was starting to dull. But at least I was confident that the spacing was correct.

Many many moons ago, when I was in eighth grade, I saved my money for most of the year until I had enough to buy a new leather jacket. I bought the jacket in March. Wouldn't you know, that was like the hottest March on record.It was like 80^o. There I was trying to sport a new leather jacket, sweating my ass off.

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Coffee

Why is it, that every single time I go to get my coffee cup out of the damn microwave, the fucking handle is in the back? I don't mean some of the time. Or even most of the time. EVERY SINGLE TIME!!! It's like the turn table is programmed to always stop 180^o from where it started. If I ever remember, I will start it with the handle in the back and see what happens. But I'm not holding my breath.

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**Happy Birthday Honey! I Love You!**

Chat room BS...

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Out of sheer boredom, I spent some time in an internet chat room today. I was looking for conversation. Well, there were about 40 people in the room, but I could only get 3 to talk to me. And that is because I started making fun of the people who would say things like "30/YO male nude on webcam" and then just expect someone to type in "Yes, that is just what I'm looking for". So I started typing in things like "LilHoE6969 is a 62/YO male in a trailer park" and "young_studXXX is only 9 years old". So, naturally, it was fun for a while. But it got me to thinking.

Do you realize that Microsoft, Intel, Motorola, and Apple owe a great deal of their success to porn? Think about it. If there was no porn on the internet, it would still be called the D.A.R.P.A. Net. The only people using it would be the military and college professors. If there was no internet, I believe, there would never have been the computer explosion of the 1990's. Just think how lame it is to use a computer without the internet. And not just to investigate how much of a wiffle ball bat can be buried inside a dime store hooker. But for real research. Like finding out if Copper was the no.1 export from China in 1999. Or if a Bearded Collie would make a good pet in an apartment.

So, keep it in mind that just maybe, porn isn't that bad. And if nothing else. The next time you're sitting home with nothing to do. Join me in a chat room and make fun of strangers. You would be supprised how fast the time flies by, when you are telling strangers personal things about strangers. Nothing but good, clean, American fun.

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P.S. If your bored after reading this post(I think I would be), I put two new links on the list. They are both lots of fun.

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The Happy Couple?

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Pandas married with city-wide ceremony in Thailand



Wed Nov 9,11:47 PM ET

BANGKOK (AFP) - Their wedding cake had three tiers decorated with dragons, but the wedding couple was only interested in eating bamboo.

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What is the first thing to come to mind when I see a headline like this? It never ceases to amaze me the lengths people will go to give themselves the feeling that they are doing a good deed. What are they trying to accomplish here? The official story is that they want the pandas to get together and make little pandas. But instead of trying to make the panda pen look and feel as much like their natural habitat as possible, they parade them around town like a couple of side show freaks. Something is telling me that this is not the best way to make them feel like they are in there natural surroundings. Maybe I'm the strange one, but I think they would have better luck getting baby pandas if they would just leave them the fuck alone!

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Sickville update:
Everyone is feeling better today. Jakes nose spray seems to be doing the trick. Brad went to school today. My muscle spasms are bearable as long as I don't cough more than once. Which isn't easy sometimes. Luckily, my asthma has not been acting up.

Sickville USA...

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Yesterday was the day of the sick. Deb, had the day off for election day, so she went to pick up her friend Cara to help her run some errands. Cara is without a car recently, which is a story I'll get into a little later. One of the errands was to take Cara's daughter Jesse to the doctor's office to get some stitches removed(related to the story that I'll get to later). Deb got home in time to get the boys from school, so I was allowed to sleep late, which is always a pleasure. Now, Jake has been complaining about his throat feeling dry, and has been coughing in his sleep the last few days so Deb took him to the doctor's office while she let me sleep(that's visit number two). When Deb got home, she told me about her visit to the Doctor's office and that he said that Jake has the croup, and she got some nasal spray. Basically, it was not a big deal. Well, when I was waking up, I sat up in bed and my back felt like there was a knife sticking out of it. Not in my back so much as where my ribs meet my spine in the back. And every time I coughed it felt like the knife was being twisted and pushed in a little farther. Being a smoker, wake up time is coughing time. I got up and got dressed, and tried to make like it was no big deal, but Deb could see that it was really painfull. So, she called her Mother and off to the emergency room we went. We dropped of the boys at her mother's on the way. I went to x-ray and back to another waiting room and finally to a room to wait for a Doc. By ribs were hurting so bad that I could not sit down and was having trouble finding any position that would relieve the pain so I was wandering around the halls, watching TV in the waiting room until a Doc came to see me. While I'm looking for some relief Deb called her Mother to check in and found out that Brad got sick and was throwing up all over Nanna's house. When the Doc finally came in to see me, I had found a position that was less painfull and when he wanted to see where it hurt it didn't. Some how most of the pain had gone away and I had to stand up and twist around to make it hurt again. So the Doc said that it was muscle spasms. Gave me a scrip for Pain killers, muscle relaxers, and anti-inflammatory. That doesn't sound right but, oh well. After that we all went home and went to bed. At which time Deb said that she wasn't feeling all that great either. She was having stomach pain and a headache. So the whole family went to sleep with some sort of pain last night.

As I eluded to earlier there is a story that goes along with the fact that Cara is without a car. The story, as I was told, goes a little like this.
Cara was at her Mother in law's house chatting in the drive way with the car ideling and no one in it. When they both noticed it was moving. Cara goes running after the car and sees that Jesse is behind the wheel with a huge smile on her face. She backed the car down the drive way and up on the grass, where she put it in drive and turned it around. She then proceded to drive it across the road and right into a tree. Jesse managed to cut her face some, that required a few stiches, but over all, she fared better than the car.

Lots of Coke...

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Cocaine traces detected in River Thames

Sun Nov 6, 4:25 PM ET

LONDON (AFP) - So much cocaine is being used in London that traces of the white powdered narcotic can be detected in the River Thames, the Sunday Telegraph newspaper said.

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Now that is a lot of dope! I read this story a few days ago, and still find it hard to believe. Think of all the possible tax revenue that the government is missing out on. If they were to legalize the drugs and tax the shit out of them, there would be so much money left over, they would be able to ease up on the taxes on beer and cigarettes. That is IF they don't spend it all instead. I think that is a more likely possibility.

I read somewhere, that the US spends something like $7 billion to "combat" drugs coming in from Columbia. That's a lot of money. But, the Columbian drug lords are making an estimated $3-4 billion. Am I the only one who sees a possible solution in those numbers. Why don't we just pay the Columbians to not make the drugs. Hell, we are paying American farmers to not grow corn. What's the difference? We could offer them more than they are making now, so how could they say no. If we were to offer them, say, $5 billion. That would give us $2 billion left over that we could use to (1) Make sure they stopped making the dope. And (2) help Balance The Stupid Fucking Budget! If you combine that money with the money we would make by executing criminals on Pay-per-view, we would be out of the red in no time. Damn it. I should have been president!

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The Final Frontier...

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It's not official, but it looks to me like they have found two more moons orbiting Pluto. It never ceases to amaze me how much there is to learn about our universe. And how fast we are making new discoveries. I mean, less than 10 years ago, they were not able to resolve a separation between Pluto and Charon, and now they are detecting two additional moons. WOW. You may not fully understand how amazing this is. Pluto is not something you can look up in the sky on a dark night and see. It is so faint that you need a telescope with at least a 10" aperture to see it as a tiny dot.

But then again, nearly everything about astronomy fascinates me. Just pondering the vastness has sometimes given me a headache. Numbers so big it is hard to comprehend. I've heard it stated that there is like one hundred billion stars in the Milky Way galaxy. And the Milky Way is one of about one hundred billion galaxies. That is hard to imagine.

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It looks like I've struck on a topic that everyone can agree on. How we as a society treat our prisoners is unacceptable. I, for one, feel that they have it far to easy. And what about corporal punishment. I have no problem with the prisoners getting set free after having their hand cut off for stealing, or being castrated for committing rape. As for the other offenders like car thieves and drug dealers, they could always bring back the chain gangs. Have them out in the hot sun, digging a ditch all morning so they can fill it back in, in the afternoon. Sounds good to me.

And what is this shit, Life without parole? I think if there is no chance for them ever getting out, we should have them participate as guinea pigs, so we can let some of the animals out of the testing labs. What did the animals do to deserve their plight. When was the last time you heard about a rooster coming home drunk and beating the shit out of his hen? NEVER! Why? Because chickens are decent people. That's why. We need to get the lifers in those labs, and then they might actually be "paying back their debt to society". Because, having them spend the rest of their lives with three square meals and a warm bed every day, is not paying anything back.

Reader Participation Wanted...

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Strange Names Wanted

I've been thinking of amassing a list of strange names, ala Bart Simpson's calls to Moe's Tavern. Such as I.P Freely or Justin Time. I've found that the real ones are usually funnier than the made up ones, but I welcome either. If you have any good ones, please enter them as a guest book entry. All I ask is that you identify the real names by surrounding it with *asterisks*. Also leave a brief description of the poor soul and your name as well. I have entered a few to get the ball rolling, and I have put some info on the guest book page. I look forward to hearing some good ones.

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Donor anyone?

I saw something today that made me think of organ donors, and the poor people on waiting lists for years on end. I think that there is an untapped source of organs that we should do something about.

Prisoners! Why don't we harvest the needed organs from death row inmates? This could be a benefit to our society on many levels.

• A fresh supply of organs. Just the fact that there will be a few more people added to the donor list will help to shorten the wait time for the people in need.


• Better training for transplant surgeons. If we have younger, less experienced doctors doing the removal of the organs from the prisoners, they will get much needed "hands on" experience. Without adding extra risk to the receiving patent. And if the "rookie" doctor happens to screw something up and the prisoner dies. Who cares. We were going to kill him anyway. But don't think that every prisoner will die as a result of the donation. I think we should put the defective organ from the patient into the prisoners. That way, if all goes well, we'll still be able to kill him.


• Fresher organs. If it is arranged that the prisoner is brought to the patient's hospital, the extraction and the "*installation" can be done at the same time. In the room next door. Then there is no need for the , high risk, mad dash across the country with an Igloo cooler, to deliver the goods. And the donor organ can be put in the patient only minutes after removal.

Now, I don't want you to think that I am some kind of heartless disciplinarian. Wanting nothing more than retribution at the expense of some wrongful accused innocents that happen to reside in the penal system. No! That is not what I am saying at all. This system would have to be limited to an exclusive variety of prisoner. One's that were convicted on concrete evidence of the DNA variety. Or, one's convicted by their own admittance. (that is definitely not the correct usage of that word) I had so much more to say, but I am running out of time. Perhaps I will post a continuation of this at a latter date.

* Sorry, but I couldn't think of a good word for putting the part in.*

The non-list...

These are things that float through my twisted mind on a regular basis. As per Twyla's request, I'll try to balance it with good and bad so as not to pop a blood vessel in my head while posting. Not necessarily a list, just a loose collection of random thoughts. The non-list, if you will.

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The future

When I was a child in elementary school, I remember my teacher telling us about the future, and when we were adults, the world would be a very different place. Technology was exploding and there were new things popping up, seemingly every day. Microwave ovens were the new big thing at the time. No longer were the days when it would take an hour to bake a potato. You could now put one in the microwave and in just a few short minutes (as opposed to long minutes?) you had a hot, fresh baked potato. They showed us pictures and movies about how they thought the houses of the future would look, and all the "new technology" that there would be. They basically filled, at least my head, with all these ideas that we would be living the "Jetsons" life style.

So, fast forward to now. Today every home has a microwave oven, but most of them have become $100 popcorn peppers, and cold coffee warmers. There are no cities in the sky, suspended on spindly legs at dizzying heights. And of course there are no flying cars. Where is my Food-A-Rac-A-Cycle, damn it. Where is Rosie the robot to clean up my stinking messes for me.

But then one day a thought occurred to me. We have something that is so futuristic that they didn't even have something like it on Star Trek. Cell phones. Think about it. Even Capitan Kirk's Communicator doesn't come close to the marvel of technology that is the modern cell phone. They are so futuristic that no one even considered just how powerful a tool a simple wireless phone can be. Take my phone for example. Pretty normal by today's standards. Admittedly, a lot sexier than most but compare it to the vast plethora of futuristic gadgets that Kirk had. Kirk's communicator worked as a "walkie-talkie", which he had to adjust with that "analog" knob to get reception. My phone does that too, but it is completely digital. No knob turning required. Plus it does things that Gene Roddenberry never even thought of. I can send and receive email, get the latest sports scores, research a stock tip, or even something really important, like locating the best site for midget porn or gay trucker sex. All while walking down the street or sitting in a pew on Sunday morning.

In short, while we don't have the flying cars and stuff, I think we have something even better, unrestricted and immediate access to internet filth, the likes of which Sodom and Gammora could never dream of. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, regardless of where you are or what you are doing. I can't speak for you, but to me, that sounds fair.

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Why?

Why do we have time zones? Are we that important that it is necessary for the sun to be at its zenith at 12pm. Think how much easier it would be to figure things like arrival times when traveling east or west. The airline industry would love it, I'm sure. When you get down to it, the only time that is important is elapsed time. The answer to the question "How long". Other than that, time is meaningless.

Why do we (English speakers) use the letter "c"? It seems to me that we could do just fine without it. Take a look at what it does. It either sounds like an "s" or a "k". Correct me if I'm wrong, but we already have both of these letters. What good is there in having two letters with the same sound. Throw it out, I say. And free your self of the extra baggage.

Halloween

This year Halloween started out with a 9am meeting at Jakob's school to set up some sort of modified lesson plan to give him more help with reading. He is entirely too much like his father when it comes to school. So, we're all sitting around this table in the principal's office and all of the teachers and social workers are introducing themselves. Well, when we got around to the language arts teacher I almost burst out laughing. She introduced herself as Mrs. Areola. I think my jaw actually dropped open for a split second. All I could think of for the rest of the meeting was that one of Jake's teachers was named Mrs. Nipple. And what a waste it was because there are no students old enough to know what it means.

I wanted to mention this the other day but.....I forgot. That reminds me of a silly quote. "I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken". Back to the topic at hand. I have a new favorite TV show. "The Colbert Report" on Comedy Central.

Steven Colbert was on "The Daily Show", and I think he did an excellent job. Now that he has his own show I thought that it might be "too much", you know. But the episode that I saw was fantastic. He has a way of doing an interview, and completely mocking the person without them catching on. And all the while keeping a perfect poker face. I remember when John Stewart started doing "The Daily Show", and he was visibly nervous and a little jumpy. Steven seems to have none of these "Green Horn" traits. He looked very relaxed sitting center stage for the first time, like an old pro.

Well, enough farting around on company time. I need to get a little work done.

I thought I was done, but just before logging out I noticed this story and have to share it. Are people really this stupid? On the other hand, we are talking about California.