Hard questions

The last week or so has been very hard. I've done a lot of soul searching and have come to some important conclusions. I've come to the conclusion that it is not the affair that is causing my pain, but the fact that I was lied to at every step of the way. I was lied to so much that I can't believe anything anymore. The worst part of this is that she knows i can't believe anything but what I see and feel, yet, she still won't show me.