The dungeon

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This weekend I managed to make myself feel totally worthless. The one thing that we needed to do more than anything was to get the basement cleaned out. We have a new washing machine being delivered in the morning and we also wanted to set it up like a play room for the boys. Well, after 3 years of neglect, the basement was a rather pitiful sight, to say the least. It was turned into a haphazard burial ground for old clothes that were worn out or too small, broken toys and boxes of grossly outdated computer parts. All of which needed to be removed. The problem was that I could only spend a few minutes down there cleaning before I was having an asthma attack, and needed to go out for air. I really felt like shit, leaving the bulk of the work to Deb. She said not to worry, that it was no big deal, but to me, it was. When she needed me, I was not able to help.

I'm also feeling inadequate on another front. The frustrating part is that the more I do about it, the worse it gets. And if I do nothing, then it still gets worse. So, what to do. Damned if I do, and damned if I don't. Maybe, the only right answer, is the one I have been avoiding all this time.